Summer...

I can't believe that it's almost the end of the summer and well I don't feel like anything has changed. I'm still spinning in the same little circle that I was when it started. It makes me sad. I wish that I could be posting news that was happy or sad but I don't have any. I have pictures to put up but my camera is upstairs and I don't really have the patience to try and deal with the camera and the computer being slow. And outside it's trying to rain which is making my internet go crazy.

I feel all full inside and no way to get it out. I really want to run. To just get out and run until I hurt. I've gotten all numb and that makes me crazy. That I want to run until I hurt just to get to a point where I can feel pain. I'm not sure why feeling numb like that makes me want to run. I don't even run in general. I guess it's really just a way to clear my mind until I can just do something to get it all out in general.

I love the fact that my boss is also my landlord. At times it's a little bit of an annoyance but other times it makes it great. There is a lot going on right now and atleast I can say that it has nothing to do with me. The next thing that I want is for my cousin to put up the fence around the little patch of patio that we have. Eventually I will get up some pics from around the apartment but haven't much had the time.

love ya!

casualty of work...

It was a long day at work and there was a casualty. Hopefully I can get the picture on here before I'm done. We have a problem at work with pens running away. So to alleviate that issue in my office, I took the box of spoons that came with the office and attached them to several of the gimmie pens from the Verizon office. That way no one would take them and if they did, then I would be able to find them.

After a year, the last remaining spoon fell victim to my desk chair. Which is the third one that I've had in the last year. I killed him. He was a good little trooper and he will be missed. I didn't even have the heart to keep the pen. I had to put in him the trash can, which he fought. But he will be missed and I will have to find something else to pass on to the next person to take my place.

love ya!

Frustrated...

Getting a little bit frustrated about everything right now. It just seems like I can't do anything right. Everything is going all to pieces and I can't do anything about it. I guess I should just stop and think about what I really want right now and maybe things will start to look up.

love ya!

happy fourth...

Happy fourth!

There's not much more that I can say today.

Just be careful and have as much fun as possible while being safe.

love ya!

Fire work pics...

These are part of the pics I took of the shirts that I did the other night. This is the front of one the shirts that I did. I actually did this one for one of the owners.

And then this is the back of mine. Not sure what I'm going to do with the front yet. I hate having a whole lot spread out on the shirt because it makes it hard to iron them after I air dry it. And those fireworks at the top are from New Year's Eve at the fireworks stand or one night leading up to it.

I like fireworks.

love ya!

Sticky fingers

My fingers are all sticky from blinging shirts. The glue is awesome but it makes a mess and then I end up with strings of glue all over the place and under my finger nails. I actually woke up with some of it underneath my finger nails. I also woke up with my lip split and scabbed over because it's summer and my lips are all dry. I was a little worried because it was right in the center of my lip and all black.

It has gotten better but it just really isn't the way that you want to wake up to. I have pictures of the shirts that I blinged but I'm not done with mine. I've gotten the back done but couldn't do the front yet. Not sure what I want to do with it. I've done the fronts of three other ones so I have an idea of what I want to do but not really sure how much I'm going to put on the front.

Then on top of that I tried to make cake pops this morning and well it really didn't go so well. It was a disaster that I will have to clean up when I get home. For some reason...well let's just say that it didn't go so well at all.

love ya!

Blah, blah blah

That's really all that I can say right now. Everything just seems to be so blah right now. There is nothing I can do to get out of this rut that I'm in. I'm in a horrible rut and I really don't care about what is going on any mire. I just want things to be over. I want to give up. I really really want to just give up because life just seems so hard and things aren't getting any easier. The more that I have to do the more that I see things really aren't going anywhere. I'm just stuck in this wretched limbo land where nothing happens but disappointment.

I want a new job. I'm so sick of the one I have that I can't stand it anymore because no matter what I do it doesn't ever seem to be enough or good enough for someone else. I bust my butt to try and get things done and every once in awhile there are a few things that don't get done and those are what I get busted for and it's starting to piss me off. I haven't gotten a you're doing good at this or that but if I do anything wrong they sure are quick to bust me for that and it's stupid.

We have people who screw things up left and right and they don't ever get in any kind of trouble. I can't help that I forgot to label one thing on the shelf and then I was in the shower when they called and I couldn't answer them. Ten minutes of the entire morning I was in the shower and that's when they call me. So I try to call them back and no one will answer the phone at work I had to call someone on their cell phone. I really didn't want this job. I really haven't ever felt comfortable doing this job and they don't seem to care about it. That I guess is my fault and something that I'm going to have to deal with. But I think that my bosses may be the reason why I'm not getting any interviews any where because they know that they aren't going to be able to replace me. No one is going to put up with the amount of stuff that I have to get what I get an hour for this job. It sucks. It really really does suck.

love ya!