I just don't have the words right now to communicate anything that I feel. It makes me sad and it makes me confused and I really don't know which way is up and things are just piling up and time is running out. I've tried to do all kinds of different things to motivate myself but in the end it really doesn't make any difference because I still feel the same, I still feel like no matter how much I try that I'm still barely treading water to keep my head above it. I'm just getting tired at this point and I don't want to try and keep my head above the water any longer, I just want to sink below the water and find an end.
It's like all the signs are showing me that there is something wrong but in the end I really can't put my finger on it and I'm not sure if I want to. Maybe this is just how it is supposed to be that we just keep trying to keep our heads above the water and in the end those that are strong will make it to the other side and those of us who are not will quietly sink beneath the turbulent waters of life and hopefully find some peace.
love ya!
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