I made a mistake...

I made a mistake.

I took a new job and I don't feel like it's the right one.

I shouldn't have done it.

I really shouldn't have done it.

I haven't even signed a contract and I already regret saying yes.

It was a stupid mistake that I made without thinking.

I was desperate.

Desperation makes for bad decisions.

I think that it was a truly bad decision.

I don't know what to do.

Happy Friday!

I have to admit that it feels good to know that today is Friday. There are a few things that I had meant to accomplish this week and well that just fell through.  That however is nothing unusual for me.

I like lists. I really like to make lists. It makes me feel that I have accomplished things. Especially at work. I like to know what I need to accomplish in a certain amount of time. Like when my boss is gone he will usually leave us a list of things that each person needs to accomplish. In those cases it also helps us to keep each other in line. If you know what someone else needs to get done then you can encourage them when they are not doing anything.

I spend more time making lists to try and get myself to accomplish things but they don't always help. And it doesn't help that it seems like all of a sudden my spell check doesn't seem to work on anything.

I'm getting really sick of people complaining about how much student debt they have. In my very bold opinion this really seems to be a case of parents not telling their children no. If you can't afford to go to a school without spending a fortune that you obviously don't have maybe you should rethink what you are planning to do. I graduated with $14,500 in student loan debt on three different loans and two different interest rates. I am half way through my repayment period and have less than $600 left to pay on them. In only 32 payments I have paid almost $14,000 back and I don't complain about it. During that time I've also paid off 29 of 60 payments on a car and put a down payment on a house and you know what, I'm still working in a job where I punch the clock.

I don't have the cushy corner office that most people are expecting when they graduate because they've picked a career based on those highly inflated starting salary lists. I've done a lot I never thought I'd do to make the rent like vacuum my boss's office or carry rocking chairs in and out of the building. I answer phones and answer mundane and stupid questions. You do what you have to do. I still haven't gotten the job that I wanted but I am working hard to accomplish that goal. I'm hoping that soon I can start posting pictures of my classroom, keep that in your thoughts if you want to.

Every once in awhile you have to make concessions about college and a job. Some times you have to put pride aside annd take a job

love ya!

Catching up

I've been trying to sit down all week and work on blogging but it just hasn't happened, mainly because it is hot and when I say hot I mean hot like frying an egg on the sidewalk kinda hot. I haven't even had a chance to look at what the weather is going to do for the rest of the week. I know that the last time I did see the weather there were seven days of triple digits and that is all I have to know. There really doesn't seem to be an end in sight and now there is Saharan dust in the air to top it off. I've had enough water that I'm surprised that I haven't floated away. It seems like it doesn't matter how much I have, I'm still thirsty and still hot all the time.

Things around here haven't been going anywhere mainly because at five o'clock I just want to get home as fast as I can to the sweet relief of air conditioning. I don't even want to go to the grocery store and probably won't do it until I run out of milk, bread and eggs, which wouldn't be bad but I only picked up milk the last time I was at the store because I had eggs and bread. So over a week and I'm down to less than a quarter of a loaf of bread and four eggs. Or I will go when I have to buy dog food, dishwasher detergent and stuff to make laundry soap. (Dog food will win out I'm pretty sure.) I say that because I can't feed my dog table scraps because well my poor sidewalk will pay for it. (If anyone knows how to keep a dog from pooping on the sidewalk let me know.)

I've gotten a few boxes cleaned out and hopefully will be getting a few more this week so that my brother can pack up some kitchen items for his first apartment. So really no pressure what so ever on the unpacking. I have some empty boxes on the porch but their integrity is not the best since they've been there for a few weeks and are covered in house paint. We did get the outside of our house painted which is awesome. We now have to go back and do some touchups and paint all the trim.

I can't keep caught up with anything and I mean anything. I'm doing my best just to read my email and check my texts. Or like today when I got slammed all of a sudden with a bunch of updates and what not on my phone and I know that some of them were from Sunday. It was bizarre and a bit scary, similar to what I experienced a few weeks ago when my email got hacked and there were about 75 bounce back emails that came all at once. Thankfully I have a ton of contacts that aren't any good any more, of course then I got a whole bunch of emails telling me that I was sending spam. It was mortifying and I'm trying to get over it.

Hopefully I can get my DVR cleaned out by the weekend so I could maybe watch something on tv when it is on. I am however spoiled to being able to fast forward through the commercials.

I was glad to see that Double Divas started a new season last night. It totally freaks my husband out when I watch it because of all the squealing.

Have to go see who is coming back on Masterchef.

love ya!

Painting...

I have finally put myself into the mode of painting. Right now the hall has one coat of paint and I am now in the process of putting on the first coat of paint in the living room.  It would be better if I weren't painting over panelling because rollers do not get down in the little groove. I have figured out that you go down each of those grooves with a paint brush first and do the top and bottom while you've got the brush and then roll the in between places.

I didn't take any before pictures mainly because I do not know the present location of my camera. I have however been able to empty a few boxes of books but that is slooow going right now. I've been spending quite a bit of time stalking some human resource pages for several different school districts and that is slooow going as well.

There have been so many things going through my mind that I don't even know where to start writing about. I havn't been the best at doing a lot these last few weeks but I am trying to make more of an effort at a lot of things. Been watching a lot of Star Trek Next Generation. It does keep me from watching one of the many mind numbing reality shows that plague the airwaves now. That has been one of the many topics of conversation at work and with family. I do want to admit that I'm not completely against reality shows I do partake in Hell's Kitchen and Master Chef and I have watched a little on the Big Brother front. I have given up on the Bachelor/Bachelorette, The Amazing Race and Survivor.

I am running into a problem with finding places to put things. Hopefully I can get one wall completely painted and get some shelving on the wall to put my knick knacks on. There are a lot of things that I have planned for the next weeks or so. I'm ready for fall so that I can work in the yard. In the morning I'm going to start cleaning out the front flowerbed so that I can put in some plants that my mom bought on the clearance rack at Lowe's. They are plants that need full shade and I think the front flowerbed is the only place that they will get that. There are a few paint cans that have to be moved that are from painting the outside of the house. We still have paint the trim and paint a few more places in the eaves and behind some hedges that need to be trimmed up as well. I am going to have to start moving some furniture to finish the painting. The biggest challenge will be painting behind the tv so that we can put up a shelf that my in-laws are giving us.

love ya!

Tasting...

My sense of taste has been all over the map the last couple of years and I don't like it or maybe I do.

When I was a child you couldn't get me to touch a casserole just because of the cream of mushroom soup in it. It didn't matter how much my mom tried to hide them in there I wouldn't eat it and well my little brothers are the same way. If a recipe calls for cream of mushroom soup my mom has to pick a different cream of soup to take the place. I though have taken to mushrooms lately to the point where I've actually ordered mushroom chicken at a restaurant.

It is to the point that there are very few places that I like to eat. I personally hate ordering something at a restaurant and then having to ask for it with out a whole bunch of things, the only exception being onions on hamburgers that just doesn't happen.

Lately it has been the smell of sauteed onions that has been getting my nose in a pinch. I really want to just buy an onion and saute it just for the smell and then maybe scramble an egg or two in the pan after I remove the onions.

love ya!

Real World...

I've been training a new employee over the last week and a half and it has made me think about a few things, the most important of which is real world skills.

I am currently a department coordinator and a teacher on the side. (And currently looking for a job.) This job entails a lot of out of the box thinking and this is not the first person that I've trained or attempted to train and that has always been the biggest problem. People can't think outside of the box.

But what I was thinking is why isn't there a class in high school that teaches you real world skills? Skills like how to fill out a job application. It would have been great to know how to understand insurance or at least what to do if you need to call insurance. Things that you shouldn't have to always be calling your parents about.

Basic phone skills would be a nice thing to teach people. There are just so many things that they don't really teach you in school because they are too busy trying to make sure that you pass the tests. I've been thinking on these things at work because it is frustrating trying to teach someone how to do a job when they won't think outside of the box. Some basic workplace survival skills would be nice. How to use a fax machine, printer, copier, scanners those kind of things. It would be nice to not come in on Monday to see that some time on Saturday afternoon someone jammed the printer and just left it. Installing and updating software on a computer.

Guidance on how to use the Internet to do research. Or just how to do a search on the Internet.

I know that these are skills that not everyone will need in the future but they are helpful. There are just skills that you need that you get out of high school or college and you don't have them. Not everyone knows how to type anymore and that is a skill that is nice to have. I know that writers have this skill or you would hope that they would because that has to be hard to do just huntin' and peckin'. It seems that I've lost steam on this topic and usually that means I have to call it quits.

love ya!

The highlight of my week...aka don't judge me

The last two weeks have been a little blah and a constant barrage of mess. To the point that there are only a few things that have made it better.

Like the day that I went to get ice and right as I opened the door to the ice  machine at work it dropped a new batch of ice. Score!

The other is so sad it is unreal. For atleast six months I have felt something in my ear. I've tried to scratch thinking that it was a little buildup of wax. There have been many days where I dig in there and just can't get the right angle with my finger and then just give up. Last week I had had it with it. Standing in front of the mirror I grabbed the tweezers and used them to scrape and then I felt it. There was a release of pressure and there it was on the end of the tweezers, it was a clogged pore.Yes it had been bugging me for atleast six months, that is a long time to be able to feel something and not be able to do anything about it.

It makes me feel really pathetic. That fresh ice and popping a zit made the last two weeks.

love ya!