Just so disappointed....

I have no idea what is going on with the kids that I am student teaching. I really don't understand what is going on with kids today. I don't understand why it is so hard to bring paper and a pen or pencil to class. I don't understand why there are so many kids that only use pencils. They never use pens and they hate when you offer them a pen to use.

I also have a strong desire to go to all my high school teachers and apologize profusely for the way that I acted in their classes. I know that it won't make up for back then but it will make me feel better for the way that I acted. I hate it. I really hate the way I feel right now. I'm becoming bitter because of what these kids do and don't do. I spend all my time waking kids up and telling them to be quiet. I wish that there was naptime to take care of all this. They don't give a flying fart in space about the dress code. Then we have the kids who flaunt the dress code with this stupid crap about being part of that church of body modification or some junk like that so that they don't have to cut their hair.

The real world will be kicking a lot of tail in a few years when they get out into the real world. It's going to be a rude awakening for my advanced class come next year. They have no idea what college is going to be like. They all live in this world where they think that everything should be handed to them. I really don't understand it and I don't think that I will. I will be looking for a job that is not at the high school level I'm pretty sure. I really hate that because I love the material that I get to teach and know that I will be taking a serious blow to have to teach at a lower level to what I have learned but if that is what keeps me sane then that is what I am going to have to do.

I hate the fact that there is a job opening come spring where I'm student teaching right now because I don't want to stay here. I want to work with kids who care. Ones that really want to learn. These kids think that if they just show up to class and do whatever it is that they want to that they will get to pass the class. They don't understand at all how a test works. It means that you study what you've been taught for the last few weeks and then you show me what you have LEARNED not showing me what you have memorized.

I will have to come back to this later on a different day.

love ya!